Teaching Confidence

As a former teenage girl, I know what it's like to have low self-esteem and a lack of confidence. A lot of it was caused by the hormone imbalances and the 'mean girl' clique at school, but I also remember a severe lack of support at home. I've tried as early as possible to start instilling in my children pride in themselves by teaching them to appreciate themselves and to know that others appreciate them. Hopefully if my plan works correctly they'll make it through those awkward stages in their life with a little more ease and later in life have a better skill set in the real world. Yes, I think confidence means that much. A woman likes a confident man, an employer likes to hire an employee who seems confident about the job, etc.

Every day after I get Riley dressed I stand him up on the changing table and ask him, "Okay Riley, how do you feel?" and he responds, "I'm feeling handsome." I like to give him compliments because he gets to expand his vocabulary while feeling good about himself. I, 100%, stand by the fact that expressing love to your child makes them more self-confident. We talk to each other a lot and practice general conversation, which really helps him when he's around new people, he has plenty of starter conversation topics. When he does something for the first few times, I make sure to cheer extra when he does it correctly, talk about boosting self-confidence, he'll start showing off.

Lucas is just old enough now that he's a little more steady on his feet but with too much going on he loses his balance. He started walking habitually on his first birthday but he's been dancing since he was old enough to sit up. Whenever I put music on, he tap dances and bounces around on his tiny little feet till he lands on his butt, which just makes him giggle and get back up. Now that he's got his white boy shuffle down, he gets excited and dances whenever he sees people that he likes.

In public, the boys come off as very outgoing and almost a little too flirty (they get that from their father). Riley likes to greet anyone in the grocery store who catches his attention, ESPECIALLY the ladies, and try to pull them into conversation. I've even had him grab the butt of a passing woman, oops! Lucas babbles and smiles the biggest four toothed smile you've ever seen. Every time we go to Publix grocery store I get both boys one of Publix balloons compliments of the store. Riley is so used to this routine that instead of asking me for a balloon, he's started to ask the cashier. I've stood behind some very shy kids in grocery store lines, quiet and staring or avoiding eye contact, those are not my kids.

Confidence comes in children through repetitive action, repeatedly telling your kids how great they are, cheering every time he uses the big boy potty, clapping every time he dances, getting a balloon every time we go to the grocery store. They pick up all their actions from you, my kids copy me, it's important I show them the actions that help them develop and grow.....even if I don't want them to.